Ferdinand Andreas Bruce, a white Swedish man with curly hair parted and swept back. He wears a three suit and a black bow tie. His face is neutral.
Content warning for transphobia, dysphoria, outing a trans person
“My brother bought me a pair of blue trousers; a brown tail coat, red skin braces, a waistcoat striped in yellow, boots made black, and a little neat cap were obtained, by that the gentleman was completed.”
– Ferdinand Andreas Bruce
To exist as a transgender person is to be in a perpetual state of proving yourself. To family, to friends, to doctors, to religious authorities, and often to yourself. In a society where the genitals determine how people are treated, what jobs are available, what marriages are legally sanctioned, and how they are expected to behave, undermining the strict system set before them is an inherently dangerous task. This is true now, and it was true in 1808 when Ferdinand Andreas Bruce was born.
Initially assigned female at birth, Bruce rejected the gender forced upon him early. Wearing trousers as a child, he became known for his continued tries to defy the gendered boundaries placed on him from birth. The only reason his story remains is that he wrote it down. Almost all the information that exists about Bruce comes from his own accounting of his life in an autobiography written as a letter to his daughter Carolina. Two drafts of the book still exist today, and there are discrepancies between texts. Though most of the changes are cosmetic, there are some stories that are shifted from the first and final drafts.
One of these stories comes at the end of his social transition. Having communicated clearly to his family that he was, in fact, a man, his assertions were initially contradicted. His father feared the scandal that may result from the news. Still, Bruce held his ground, and eventually, his father brought him to a doctor. Bruce described the experience writing:
"My father then said that he could not know about his daughters' bodily constitu-tions, this my daughter declares to be a man, has passions like a man and has now dressed like a man, what is now needed is a certificate stating the true conditions which I hope that you Mr. Director- general my Lord Brother, will truthfully grant us! He [the doctor] escorted me to a separate room, investigated me in every possible way, I described how it was, he said nothing, but I said when he left me that if I am not al-lowed to wear trousers I cannot live. My father did not say a single word and when the director had written and sealed, we took leave of him. We did not know what he had written until we reached the place where we had left our horse, where my father read it to me. We entered the carriage and drove out of town. There was an inn and we had some food and a glass of wine together. Then my father said: Cheers my new son, see to it that you honour yourself, Andreas shall be your name that is the name of my grand- father."
It is because of this examination that a certificate exists claiming that Bruce was, in fact, intersex. Some have since challenged that claim. Regardless, Bruce himself was very clear that he was a man and finally was able to live as one after the examination. It is here where the contradictions in the text come, as the final draft of his autobiography stated his social transition was a quiet and uncontroversial affair. The first recounts a story of a noblewoman fainting in a church upon seeing Bruce on the men's pew.
There was at least some reaction to his public transition. He was forced to apologize to his family for the stir his transition had caused. In a newspaper article and a song, Bruce's father blamed him and accused him of damaging the family name. In response, he wrote an apology dictated by a clergy member.
Bruce would go on to work to prove himself as a man, focusing in his autobiography on his bravest moments and comparing himself often to cisgender men. One significant and affirming step for Bruce was to join the military. Though the details of his enlistment remain largely unknown, for a time, he seemed at peace there. He wrote:
"I had the proper disposition, fearless, merry and pleased, punctual and taciturn when that was appropriate, no drunkard but not a total abstainer either, not begrudging any-body what appealed to myself."
While he was largely accepted in his new place and had a desire to make a career for himself there, a doctor whom he refused to sell horses to outed him in revenge which changed the trajectory of Bruce's life.
It was around this time that another event changed the course of Bruce's path when he became pregnant due to an encounter with a man that cannot be confirmed as either consensual or non-consensual.
Initially going through a period of what reads as intense dysphoria, when Bruce made the decision to go through with the pregnancy, he went all in. Through labour, he determined to prove he was a man he would not cry out, though the doctor advised him to do so to relieve the pain, he went through nine hours of labour silently. In 1837, he gave birth to a daughter he named Carolina.
Determined to be a good father to his child, he initially allowed her to live with a foster family while he regained his feet. Once he was able to care for her, he brought her to live with him and his partner Maria Lindblad, who had a daughter of her own. For a long while, the four lived as a family, until Bruce and Lindblad wanted to marry. The doctor who initially outed Bruce did so again, and Bruce was forbidden from marrying Maria or taking part in communion.
A deeply religious man, Bruce was upset by this declaration, and it coloured his view of his entire life. By the end of his life, he viewed the choices he made and the fight he fought to be recognized as a man as sins. That being said, up to his death in 1885 at the age of 76, he did not stop the fight, experiencing abuse from employers, braving dangerous circumstances, writing an autobiography, and joining the military all to prove he was not just a man but also an honourable one.
REFERENCES AND FURTHER READING
Disclaimer: some of the sources may contain triggering material
Maurits, A., Ljungberg, J., & Sidenvall, E. (2021). Cultures in Conflict. Peter Lang. https://www.peterlang.com/view/title/71198
Riksarkivet. (n.d.). Riksarkivet—Sök i arkiven. Riksarkivet. Retrieved August 28, 2021, from https://sok.riksarkivet.se/?postid=ArkisRef+SE%2FARKIS%2F71348&type=2&s=Balderhttps://www.qx.se/samhalle/28930/sveriges-forsta-transperson-therese-andreas-bruce